Sarcasm and Humor Help

During my nine-day stay in a hospital Neuro ICU, I wasn't able to keep my sarcastic nature at bay.  According to my parents, I was born sarcastic.

Here are things I said that probably shouldn't be said when being treated for a stroke:

Doctor: 'You've had a stroke.'

Me:  'HOLY SHIT. Oh, sorry for the outburst.'

Doc: 'That's okay. I would have said the same.'

Psychologist  sent to assess me: 'Are you afraid of anything at home?'

Me: 'Only during tornados and storms. I'm afraid of trees falling on the house.'

Psychologist: 'Have you ever done anything to harm yourself?'

Me: "I'm sure my diet and lack of exercise haven't helped.'

Psychologist: 'Will you be worried about anything when you leave the hospital?'

Me: 'Yes, how I'm going to pay the bill.'

A neurosurgeon told me surgery (decompression craniectomy) would be performed as a 'last resort'.

Neurosurgeon upon entering room (looking very serious to give me an update regarding possible surgery): 'Um...'

Me: 'So, do I get to choose the spot where you drill and cut into my skull?'

Neurosurgeon: 'No, we'd do it at the top and wouldn't shave off as much hair as you might think. But, I have things to do this weekend, so I'd rather not have to come in to do surgery'.

Me: 'I'd hate to interrupt your tee time.'

He left the room shaking his head. He didn't appreciate my humor, obviously. 

Fortunately for us both, I narrowly escaped the surgery although he did return to visit quite frequently.

Boss, not yet aware of why I was in hospital: 'How are you feeling?'

Me: 'Pretty shitty. I had a stroke so I won't be in Monday.

My mom: 'Stop being so chipper, people will think nothing is wrong with you!'

Me: 'I think the MRI and CT scans say otherwise'.

The point of sharing these snarky moments - humor definitely helps lessen stress. Despite any possible deficits, I  never thought I wouldn't come out of my nightmare okay.  Granted I may have been the only one who found myself humorous, sarcasm definitely helped me get through it, both during and after my hospital stay. 

Why I Fear Headaches

It's been ten long months since my stroke yet every time I have a headache I have a minor freak out moment (actually a few minutes, okay, longer than a few).

A little background... I was violently woken at 3am by my cerebellar stroke. I was fast asleep and then BOOM, I was wide awake. I had very violent vertigo that felt as though my body was spinning out-of-control backward (feet over head) over and over and over again at a fast rate of speed.

I gripped the comforter hoping to stabilize myself, but that didn't work, hell, I couldn't even feel the bed beneath me. I was yelling "Oh my God, help me, help me, help me" to my sleeping husband who had no idea what the hell was going on when he woke.

The entire back of my head and neck were in excruciating pain - worse than any migraine you can imagine. My neck felt as though it had been beaten with a baseball bat and my head with a hammer (not that I have any idea what either feel like, but it's the best way I can describe it).

I didn't go to the emergency room for four days but that's a different story entirely. When I finally made it to the ER, I described the headache (still there but worse) and vertigo in such detail that the ER doc knew something was seriously wrong neurologically. I've read a number of cases where people go to an ER thinking they have vertigo or severe dizziness and are told by doctors, yep, thats what's wrong, when actually they've learned later they've had an artery dissection (vertebral or carotid) and/or stroke.

Anyhow, the point of this post... (and again, I'm not offering medical advice!) Last night I had a headache on the back left side of my head - the side where the dissection and stroke occurred. It didn't feel like a typical headache and it wasn't exactly the same or as excruciating as with the stroke. It's times like these when I wonder if I should go to an ER or if I'm just being paranoid. I struck out the ER option as I wasn't having vertigo or dizziness while doing the "touch my finger/touch your nose" test with my husband.

Should you ever find yourself at an ER for vertigo or dizziness, be sure the doctor performs this test. It was this test that told the ER doc that I definitely had something wrong neurologically. I failed the test as I had Nystqgmus (Wikipedia can show you show what it looks like and describes it in detail). She ordered an MRI and CT scan, but "touch my finger/touch your nose" may have made the difference between being told I had vertigo and to go home rather than being diagnosed correctly!